I have some “erotic skillz” that I’d like to share. Ways of being alive and awake and sensually engaged. I hope they are useful and that you will be inspired to share some as well.
I love being in my body. The experience of engaging in my senses in the world is yummy and so richly sexual at times. I practice cultivating my ability to engage my senses and awareness. It’s one of the ways I continue to expand as a sensual being.
The other day I was waiting in a coffee shop to meet a client, who was running late, and so I took the time for myself, for my senses to engage and for my desire to bubble up. I ordered my favorite drink and chose a table near the center of the place, then sat and “presenced” myself.
Presencing for me means letting go of the distractions and stories that run in my head, dropping into my body and being open to my senses. Being present means that I am aware of myself as a part of the world, not as a thought form but as actually connected and in my body.
My body takes in so much information. The temperature of the air on my skin as another customer comes in through the door, the smells of coffee brewing and the hint of sweet and cinnamon as a pastry is warmed. I can hear the voices, snatches of conversation, each voice unique in pitch and tone. Scanning the colorful art on the walls, the style and texture of fabric on bodies, the movement of hands and faces. Then the taste of rich coffee, slight foam of milk contrasting with the deep bitter of espresso.
My senses are awake and aroused, my mouth and tongue, my eyes and my ears, skin and body open to so much in that brief moment. I feel it to my core and am grateful to be a human animal.
All of this in ten minutes before my client arrives. I am already there for them, I am alive and focused. Letting go of my awareness of the rest of the room, I can bring my full attention to them. I can listen to them with my body and my senses, knowing my own separateness and holding space for them to be engaged and witnessed.