I was recently at a workshop doing energy and trance work. I am interested in sexual energy and the connection to my essential experience of life…woo woo enough?
Call it tantra and kundalini if you like. It’s the force and connection to the universal that reminds me that I am alive and unique, and at the same time that I am a tiny part of the universe.
A lot of my focus in sex is on this energy, moving it, raising it, opening to it. I can do that in many many ways from a simple touch, to breathing to … well, fucking.
My workshop was not on technique, but I thought that I would share some, so here goes. First of all…try being in your own body. If that sounds familiar or like territory that you are comfortable with, then imagine doing/being done by someone who is aware of you, and also centered in themselves. That leads to great sex because you are connected to each other, present to what is working and what is not.
Try doing what you like to do from a place of curiosity and desire. I like exploring with my mouth because I like sensation and taste. If I am blindfolded, then I can hear as well as feel responses more acutely because my eyes are covered. Curiosity and play create intimacy too because it becomes a shared experience.
Breathing is key also. Better breathing increases circulation, awareness and pleasure. If you can breathe deeply during stimulation, you will last longer and enjoy more. Try it, practice it and see.
In summary, a lot of “good sex” is in being present to your lover, being curious and playful and breathing. Now it’s your turn. What memorable sensation have you given or received during sex? How did you do it?